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| Investment Advice |
In these strange and uncertain financial times, here's a different perspective on investing your hard-earned money:
If you had purchased $1000.00 of AIG stock one year ago, it would now be worth $56.91.
With Washington Mutual, you would have $120.36 left of the original $1000.
With 'Fannie Mae'(FNM), you would have $11.34 left.
If you had purchased $1000.00 of Lehman Bros one year ago it would now be almost worthless, less than $0.86.
But, if you had purchased $1000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling
refund you would have $214.00.
Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. This is called the 401-Keg Plan. Environmentally and fiscally responsible. |
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| Blonde Painter |
An ambitious young blonde woman, in need of money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type. She began, door to door, canvassing a wealthy neighborhood for work. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
“Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?”
The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
“You’re finished already?” he asked.
“Yes,” the blonde answered, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.” Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50.
“And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.” |
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